I've been ranting and raving about how bad GTA4 is/was since 2008, welcome to the resistance!
Lock-on is the only real way to play that one. Manual aiming just, y'know, super fucking sucked and was godawful slow?
Although, I do have slightly good news: The driving, as it turns out, is
intentionally bad. Certain cars - like just about everything nearby when you start the game - have hidden stats that just make them utterly miserable experiences. You'll routinely spin/burn out and crash into things if you're not exceedingly slow and methodical. There are like 2~3 early-ish cars you can find that control
much better, IIRC, and I basically just made a mental note of those cars and would go out of my way to find them. Better that minor frustration than struggling to maintain control and potentially fail missions, y'know?
The final mission has
you on a dirt bike that controls bad and has weird collision detection with the rocks on the ground though. No avoiding that one at all. And it's still amongst the most obnoxious, rage-quitty experiences I've had with a video game.