Discussion Tavern: Sleeping Giant

[Nac McWeeble]

@VashTheStampede after planning an epic boss fight and it's negated by a crossbow bolt

 

[TD]

Thank you, T’anks Kutshort has no difficulty using the tiefling’s name this time

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

I'll allow the one-shotting of the boss.

But only if it's Dude and his hulking sword that does it.

And only if T'anks scores a nat20 for something useful for once.

 

[TD]

I'll allow the one-shotting of the boss.

But only if it's Dude and his hulking sword that does it.

And only if T'anks scores a nat20 for something useful for once.

Translation:
I've buttered up Kutshort now I want to butter up Dude.

Fun current campaign trivia:
Dude has never addressed T'anks by name when speaking to her.

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

It's basically been this the entire chapter with that one:

 

[Kutshort Yes]

She saved Hopper, that gives her some degree of respect from me. She is not entirely forgive, but it’s a start

 

[TD]

Dude & Dragmire
vs
T'anks & Kutshort

jk

 

[TD]

remembers that time that Vash said Christina had a theory this campaign would be a villain origin story

 

[Kutshort Yes]

Dude & Dragmire
vs
T'anks & Kutshort

jk

Akshooally, it’s

Kutshort & Hopper vs the world

 

[TD]

Dragmire - the master of his own cliffhanger.

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

If Jumpy ever starts doing FFXI storylines I fully expect him to wander in one day speaking either like a Tarutaru, or just Shantotto herself.

And when he does, I'm going to have to backhand him.

 

[Kutshort Yes]

Dragmire is never early and never late. He eldritch blasts exactly when he is meant to

 

[TD]

...and says exactly what needs to be said when it needs to be said.

He's a legend in the making and all the people in [insert D&D town name] will know his name.

 

[TD]

...and he's going to get to go down his chimney.

 

[Kutshort Yes]

...and says exactly what needs to be said when it needs to be said.

He's a legend in the making and all the people in [insert D&D town name] will know his name.

*cough* Phandalin *cough*

 

[Kutshort Yes]

...and he's going to get to go down his chimney.

After we kill Klarg, we should all slide down the chimney and then run back to Klarg’s room and do it again like kids at the park

 

[TD]

*cough* Phandalin *cough*

IF WE ACTUALLY GET THERE.

 

[TD]

After we kill Klarg, we should all slide down the chimney and then run back to Klarg’s room and do it again like kids at the park

Can we find lettuce first.

 

[Kutshort Yes]

IF WE ACTUALLY GET THERE.

We’ve got time. We don’t actually need to rescue Gundren, we just need to find his map. Consider it a team building exercise

 

[Kutshort Yes]

Can we find lettuce first.

Kutshort will raid his stuff looking for lettuce for you

 

[TD]

We’ve got time. We don’t actually need to rescue Gundren, we just need to find his map. Consider it a team building exercise

I wanna be the guy who talks to every NPC in every building for world building reasons and trying to find side quests.

...wait that's a thing right?

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

@TD randomly pulled quotes, you will immediately get the idea.

Shantotto : Well, well, well...look who finally decided to show.
Shantotto : The adventurer, (name), Who lends her/his name to the definition of "slow."
Shantotto : And while introductions are utterly unnecessary on our part, We shall do so out of courtesy, from the goodness of our heart.
D. Shantotto : Domina Shantotto is our name, and our occupation thus:
D. Shantotto : The first and eternal empress of the Shantotto Empire; in effect, its sturdy truss.
D. Shantotto : From this day forth all adventurers are our minions.
D. Shantotto : For all things beneath the heavens are under our dominion.
D. Shantotto : Now as we are royally busy, we shall hop straight to the point. We comission you on your inaugural mission--do try not to disappoint!
D. Shantotto : Seek out the protocrystals that lie scattered across the land. Affix to them these enchanted seals as securely as you can.
D. Shantotto : Of the six we shall entrust you, three or more must be attached To their corresponding protocrystals; our brilliant plan shall then be hatched.
D. Shantotto : With the enchanted seals in place the crystals' power shall be amplified. Thence, we can expand our borders and conquer away 'til satified.
D. Shantotto : For she who controls the protocrystals and their energy controls the world. In every corner or Vana'diel our resplendent banner shall be unfurled!
D. Shantotto : Know that a reward awaits you upon completion of your task. The amount is performance-based, if thats the question you would ask.
D. Shantotto : Now then, (name), look smart, stay sharp, go forth and do our will.
D. Shantotto : Our empire shall reign in glorious might--oh golly, what a thrill!
D. Shantotto : Upon completion of your mission, return here with all due haste. Be brave, stay strong, keep heart no matter what dangers you might face.
D. Shantotto : For the glory of your empress and her immortal empire,
D. Shantotto : be prepared to lay down your life, fear not the day you might expire.

Yoran-Oran: Can I help-ethy you?

I am Yoran-Oran, former Minister of the Rhinostery...

Cherukiki: Father!

Kukki-Chebukki: Dad, we missed you!

Makki-Chebukki: Daddy, your beautiful children are here!

Yoran-Oran: Wh-wh-what...what-ethy?

Yoran-Oran: What is the meaning of this barging-ethy into people's homes?
And why are you calling-ethy me "Daddy"?

Makki-Chebukki: You probably didn't know it, Father, but we were in Mother's tummy when you were separated.

Cherukiki: In Mommy's tummy!

Kukki-Chebukki: And that's why we've been looking for you all this time!

Cherukiki: Looking for you, Daddy!

Koru-Moru: Why, Doctor-doodly Yoran-Oran! Who would've thought you'd have such cute-tootlin' kiddly-winks!?

Shantotto: So many children, you devious creature!
We must have the Tarutaru times write up a feature!

Yoran-Oran: I have-ethy no idea what's going on here!
There must-ethy be some sort of mistake!

Shantotto: Ohoho!
You men are all the same.
Not one of you ever wants to take the blame!

Yoran-Oran: I understand-ethy now.
Yes, I did travel to Tavnazia once, many years ago.

Yoran-Oran: But that was only for the purpose-ethy of appraising a rare discovery.

Yoran-Oran: Pirates, thieves, and all kinds of treasure hunters had brought-ethy unusual items from all over the world to the marquisate...

Yoran-Oran: These items had been hidden-ethy in a chamber beneath the Tavnazian Sacrarium.

Yoran-Oran: I was led-ethy to that reliquiarium only after agreeing-ethy to never speak of the objects I would see.

Yoran-Oran: When we entered the chamber, I was asked to look at a frightening-ethy statue that had been dug up from some goddess-forsaken labyrinth...

Koru-Moru: Frightening statue?
Well, spring-spillingly-spill it, man! What kind of slap-daddily statue was it?

Yoran-Oran: I...I'm not sure.

Shantotto: You were invited to the faraway land of Tavnazia and you gave them a "not sure"?
All I have to say is, "What an amateur!"

Shantotto: An embarrassment to the ministers of Windurst, an absolutaru disgrace.
You've gone and smeared mud on our collective face.

Shantotto: And now hear these poor fatherless children's wailings.
Is there no end to your dismal failings?

Yoran-Oran: I'm telling-ethy you, I am not their father!

Yoran-Oran: And I was not called-ethy to Tavnazia to appraise the nature of that statue.

Yoran-Oran: My task was to discern-ethy where it had been excavated from by analyzing the traces of soil that still clung-ethy to its surface.

Koru-Moru: And did you flang-fig-figurey out where the soil was from?

Yoran-Oran: Of course I did.
It was silt from the bottom-ethy of the sea.
From the Sea of Shu'Meyo, I believe.

Koru-Moru: The Sea of Shu'Meyo...
The inland-ified sea north of Jeuno.

Koru-Moru: Isn't that body of water non-stoppingly-notorious for ships sinking on even the calm-balmiest of days?

Yoran-Oran: It is indeed-ethy.
What's more, the statue was said to be found-ethy not in the sea, but deep-ethy within the earth.

Shantotto: What a fascinating tale, I must conclude.
And after unfurling this mystery, you were elated enough to start your own brood?

Yoran-Oran: Would you give it a rest-ethy!

Yoran-Oran: Do you see-ethy what you've done!
My reputation is in ruins!

Yoran-Oran: Now explain-ethy yourselves!

Cherukiki: We're sta~rving.

Kukki-Chebukki: I feel...faint.
No energy...to talk.

Makki-Chebukki: I feel dizzy...

Yoran-Oran: Fine! There's a restaurant in Windurst Waters.
Come back-ethy after you've had something to eat!

Makki-Chebukki: Yay!

Kukki-Chebukki: All right!

Cherukiki: Food!

Yoran-Oran: Why me...?

Yoran-Oran: What-ethy a calamity!
My pristine-ethy image has been sullied!

Yoran-Oran: No good-ethy! No good-ethy!
I must restore-ethy my high standing in the community!

Yoran-Oran: That's it!
The Mimeo Mirror!
Its memory-viewing powers are perfect-ethy for this situation!

Yoran-Oran: I'll use the mirror to show-ethy all my memories of Tavnazia!
I'll prove-ethy my innocence to the world!

Yoran-Oran: Now if I can just remember-ethy the person who owned a Mimeo Mirror.
I seem to recall-ethy a rather unpleasant personage boasting about his possessions a while back...

Yoran-Oran: Calm-ethy yourself, Yoran-Oran.
You're too worked up-ethy to think straight...

I believe I can count on your support for backhanding him and keeping him in line.

 

[Kutshort Yes]

I wanna be the guy who talks to every NPC in every building for world building reasons and trying to find side quests.

...wait that's a thing right?

That’s how I play all games. I explore every map and try to complete every available side quest before moving on to the main story. You never know when a side quest will disappear or when the map will lock and prevent you from returning to a place

 

[TD]

@TD randomly pulled quotes, you will immediately get the idea.

View attachment 9829





I believe I can count on your support for backhanding him and keeping him in line.

Oh my.

Also can I just say that it's hilarious that all I did was give you a "wut?" and you knew exactly how to respond to just that?

 

[TD]

That’s how I play all games. I explore every map and try to complete every available side quest before moving on to the main story. You never know when a side quest will disappear or when the map will lock and prevent you from returning to a place

 

[TD]

Would it be correct to assume with kut's roll that the 1st dice match and the 2nd dice match?

 

[Kutshort Yes]

Would it be correct to assume with kut's roll that the 1st dice match and the 2nd dice match?

That’s how I assume it to be

 

[TD]

Maybe we'll wrap up Chapter 1 today...

either through death or success.

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

My post-battle monologue is currently sitting at 18,347 words. I haven't had much time to write this afternoon, so I apologize for it being so short.

But we're on track for finishing before the end of March, absolutely.

 

[TD]

My post-battle monologue is currently sitting at 18,347 words. I haven't had much time to write this afternoon, so I apologize for it being so short.

But we're on track for finishing before the end of March, absolutely.

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

The fact that it's debatable whether that's true or not is the best part.

 

[TD]

I could see it going both ways... absolutely.



I'm sure an enormous monologue would subside Dude's current goblin blood rage.

 

[Kutshort Yes]

My post-battle monologue is currently sitting at 18,347 words. I haven't had much time to write this afternoon, so I apologize for it being so short.

But we're on track for finishing before the end of March, absolutely.

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

Don't worry, I got you.

Spoiler

 

[Kutshort Yes]

Don't worry, I got you.

Spoiler

I will reserve judgement until I see if you betray us again

 

[TD]

Don't worry, I got you.

Spoiler

Oh no are you gonna run off and get knocked out again?

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

 

[TD]

 

[Kutshort Yes]

Dude i don’t know about you, but my thoughts on the devil are as follows:

 

[TD]

Dude i don’t know about you, but my thoughts on the devil are as follows:

Dude had a hard time trusting her before he saved her life and she dropped that bombshell.

Dude is now the Emotional Damage meme.

...but I get to pivot my character development arch a bit.

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

After the chapter concludes, all will become clear!

Most will become clear.

...Some small measure will definitely be clear.

Or we all die and nothing will.

 

[Kutshort Yes]

After the chapter concludes, all will become clear!

Most will become clear.

...Some small measure will definitely be clear.

Or we all die and nothing will.

Unless you know what chapter 2 will bring, or discussed some of this with Vash, I don’t know how clear it will be

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

Unless you know what chapter 2 will bring, or discussed some of this with Vash, I don’t know how clear it will be

I can neither confirm nor deny the existence of extraterrestrial dinosaurs wearing parachute pants, if that's what you mean?

 

[TD]

After the chapter concludes, all will become clear!

Most will become clear.

...Some small measure will definitely be clear.

Or we all die and nothing will.

...or perhaps less will be clear.

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

Was kinda hoping for two rooms, honestly.

So uh... I guess the chute does connect to Klarg's chamber in some way? That definitely would've gone sideways.

 

[TD]

Dude has a couple things to do before proceeding.

 

[TD]

(but is waiting to see if there's lettuce)

 

[Kutshort Yes]

Dude has a couple things to do before proceeding.

I’m good waiting. Should we take a short rest or are we good to go?

 

[TD]

I don't think we need a short rest, T'anks and I only did one inspiration and they're both still in place. I think HP is good overall.

 

[T'anks Kiraine]

Any attempt to rest sounds like it's going to result in an ambush by a Bugbear and at least one Goblin, too.