Ben Wolf Paranormal Post-Mortem

[Ben]

I wouldn't mind trying spotted dick but can we come up with an alternative name that us Puritan Americans can use?

Speckled Pecker.

 

[VashTheStampede]

Poxxed Ricky

 

[Ants!]

Failed detective.

 

[VashTheStampede]

Rich Freckles

 

[Ants!]

Speckled Pecker.

 

[VashTheStampede]

 

[Christina]

All good answers. I think we will combine 2 and go with Speckled Detective. Good job everyone.

 

[dimmerwit]

Do I dare to post a traditional main course?

 

[dimmerwit]

...yeah we're definitely going to need an alternative name for that in America.

 

[Ben]

View attachment 27642

...yeah we're definitely going to need an alternative name for that in America.

Pig cigs. There, done.

Also, not like it isn't a slur in the UK too, if I recall. Although perhaps not the most common, especially among smokers.

 

[dimmerwit]

Yeah it's definitely a slur in context these days. Say it pejoratively and you'll get a beating.

That said, I did have some of the above product relatively recently. They were pretty mediocre.

 

[Christina]

Pig cigs. There, done.

Also, not like it isn't a slur in the UK too, if I recall. Although perhaps not the most common, especially among smokers.

Nope in the US you can not have something names after cigarettes either. That might encourage children to smoke with is bad.

By the look of what's on that box we will just call that Pork Salisbury Steak, because whatever that is, does not look like a proper sausage.

 

[dimmerwit]

It was food for the poor, traditionally made of pork offal and wrapped in caul fat which is basically the membrane that surrounds a pig's internal organs. Occasionally testicles were added too, or bread for bulk. Caul fat is legimately really good stuff. I believe the modern product you see there is just liver which is easier to source on an industrial scale.

 

[Christina]

It was food for the poor, traditionally made of pork offal and wrapped in caul fat which is basically the membrane that surrounds a pig's internal organs. Occasionally testicles were added too, or bread for bulk. Caul fat is legimately really good stuff. I believe the modern product you see there is just liver which is easier to source on an industrial scale.

Ok so well call that monstrosity British Sausage

 

[shortkut]

My point I'm trying to make poorly. It's like salt. You can add salt to a dish and it just makes it taste better, but doesn't necessarily make it taste salty. Vinegar works this way too. Sure you can make a Vinegary dish if you like that, but adding a bit of Vinegar into your dishes can brighten up and balance out the flavors. It's why a lot of restaurant foods taste better than what you make at home. Also butter. Some of them places do be loving to add lots of butter.

Most places use too much vinegar

 

[Ben]

Ok so well call that monstrosity British Sausage

I just go by "Ben", tbh.

 

[dimmerwit]

I just go by "Ben", tbh.

I'd like to contest but you're the one with kids.

 

[Ben]

I'd like to contest but you're the one with kids.

 

[Ben]

And hopefully no more. Ever.

 

[Ants!]

And hopefully no more. Ever.

Get the snip! I did.

 

[Ben]

Get the snip! I did.

Got a consult coming up in May, my dude.

 

[Ben]

This thread;

 

[dimmerwit]

This thread;

Bro trying to sneak in a Jurassic Park reference to discuss that instead?

 

[Ants!]

Lol we finished talking about Wolf forever ago and now it's just whatever

 

[Christina]

As a woman I'm so glad that more men are ok with getting snipped.

 

[Ben]

As a woman I'm so glad that more men are ok with getting snipped.

Oh definitely. Onus of responsibility shouldn't be on y'all.

Plus no one wants to keep getting poked by an IUD string.

 

[Ants!]

Got a consult coming up in May, my dude.

I'll tell ya, back when I got mine, they asked a lot of personal questions about having kids and stuff and they were like "are you sure? Are you sure? Are you sure?" And then finally the doctor was like "okay so you've had one kid and you're done, eh?" And I had hit 40 and have three other kids that aren't biologically mine, so finally they went ahead with it.

So messed up like I had to talk them into giving me "permission" to take the procedure.

I imagine what women go through must be ten times worse.

 

[Ants!]

As a woman I'm so glad that more men are ok with getting snipped.

I used to think "never in a million years." Then when I met my wife, she was on the nuva ring, and mentioned how it messed up her hormones, but she was okay with it. So I thought about it and was like, why don't I just get the snip?

Best thing ever.

 

[shortkut]

Get the snip! I did.

I plan on it

 

[A Baby Maker]

I have 0 kids so give me a sec.

 

[shortkut]

As a woman I'm so glad that more men are ok with getting snipped.

It’s a minimally invasive, yet also reversible procedure. I don’t understand why there’s pushback against it

 

[A Baby Maker]

It’s a minimally invasive, yet also reversible procedure. I don’t understand why there’s pushback against it

How can be man if balls no work

 

[dimmerwit]

It’s a minimally invasive, yet also reversible procedure. I don’t understand why there’s pushback against it

Is it? I was always told that you couldn't necessarily rely on it being reversible.

 

[shortkut]

How can be man if balls no work

Balls exist to cause pain when hit. I think they still work as intended in that regard

 

[A Baby Maker]

Is it? I was always told that you couldn't necessarily rely on it being reversible.

 

[Ben]

It’s a minimally invasive, yet also reversible procedure. I don’t understand why there’s pushback against it

Because certain political parties wouldn't have their "keep the women suppressed and baby-laden" excuse to keep the lower-classes in poverty.

I don't think any of them actually believe the whole "spilling your seed is a sin" thing. They just don't want everyone getting their footing beneath them, and they want to ensure there are workers for their factories.

 

[dimmerwit]

Besides, there are plenty of other things in life to give you that sensation!

 

[Christina]

It’s a minimally invasive, yet also reversible procedure. I don’t understand why there’s pushback against it

Oh that's because some men operate on the Greener Pastures Philosophy. The GPP is a thought process were you need to be prepared encase something better comes along. Sure a man might be done having children with his current wife, but what if a younger hotter dumber girl shows up in his life? He's going to need to make sure he can still give that future wife a baby if she wants one.

 

[Ben]

Oh that's because some men operate on the Greener Pastures Philosophy. The GPP is a thought process were you need to be prepared encase something better comes along. Sure a man might be done having children with his current wife, but what if a younger hotter dumber girl shows up in his life? He's going to need to make sure he can still give that future wife a baby if she wants one.

That's only seems like a thing if you pair it with the "Dead Beat Dad" philosophy and don't support your former choices.

But... Yeah that checks out. I think anyone with that kind of weird possessive mentality over women isn't likely to be paying child support willingly, or whatever.

EDIT: I just consider myself lucky my sperm were like "No, dude, NO" and I didn't end up with kids in my failed marriage. Not that having a son with someone I didn't marry was any easier, but I feel like it wasn't as messy as it could have been.

 

[Christina]

That's only seems like a thing if you pair it with the "Dead Beat Dad" philosophy and don't support your former choices.

But... Yeah that checks out. I think anyone with that kind of weird possessive mentality over women isn't likely to be paying child support willingly, or whatever.

EDIT: I just consider myself lucky my sperm were like "No, dude, NO" and I didn't end up with kids in my failed marriage. Not that having a son with someone I didn't marry was any easier, but I feel like it wasn't as messy as it could have been.

Oh there are lots of sub philosophies to help with this. Some wait till the first kids are adults to find their Greener Pastures. Some try to do the hide the younger dumber girl on the side method. Some do choose the Monitary Cloaking of Funds method as you have described. The creativity is truly as ingenious as it is self serving.

 

[Ants!]

It’s a minimally invasive

Yeah I heard that too.

But....

Dude. Even with the area being numbed, I'm super glad I don't have to go through that a second time. Even if it wasn't technically painful, it was still really uncomfortable and I could still feel him yanking things around down there like a cartoon mechanic under the hood throwing wrenches or something.

I don't want to put anyone off getting it though. It was over fairly quickly and I am super glad I did it, it was completely worth it. Besides, maybe it's different for everybody? Or maybe I'm just a wuss. lol

 

[Christina]

Yeah I heard that too.

But....

Dude. Even with the area being numbed, I'm super glad I don't have to go through that a second time. Even if it wasn't technically painful, it was still really uncomfortable and I could still feel him yanking things around down there like a cartoon mechanic under the hood throwing wrenches or something.

I don't want to put anyone off getting it though. It was over fairly quickly and I am super glad I did it, it was completely worth it. Besides, maybe it's different for everybody? Or maybe I'm just a wuss. lol

As somebody who had to have a uterine biopsy. Where they have to go up through your cervix to scrape around. They give you no local for that because insurance won't pay for it because some dumbass thought ages ago that it shouldn't hurt. You are a wuss. A lot of women get told it doesn't hurt and they are being dramatic. My doctor was at least up front that it hurts a lot, but the best she can do is be able to get it done before I can count to 10. She did manage to get it done by 7, but dear God that was unpleasant.

 

[Benzine]

funny, i have my appt for this on the 4th of april

 

[Ants!]

As somebody who had to have a uterine biopsy. Where they have to go up through your cervix to scrape around. They give you no local for that because insurance won't pay for it because some dumbass thought ages ago that it shouldn't hurt. You are a wuss. A lot of women get told it doesn't hurt and they are being dramatic. My doctor was at least up front that it hurts a lot, but the best she can do is be able to get it done before I can count to 10. She did manage to get it done by 7, but dear God that was unpleasant.

Yep, I do not mean to compare it to the female version of this procedure at all. I know people are speaking by comparison when they say it's not invasive for men, but at the same time it's not NOTHING either. To hear some people talk about it you'd think it was like getting a shot or something.

I will own the wuss title though!

 

[Christina]

We should start a celebration custom around guys doing this. Like how people tried to get the push gift thing started for popping out a baby. You get dessert, a fun decorated ice pack, and a present.

 

[Ants!]

We should start a celebration custom around guys doing this. Like how people tried to get the push gift thing started for popping out a baby. You get dessert, a fun decorated ice pack, and a present.

Well, my wife was so appreciative she ordered pasta from a fancy restaurant (not Olive Garden) and served it to me in bed. Pasta is my favorite food. So that was something.

Edit: probably also because I had to keep an ice pack on my balls and strain myself as little as possible.

 

[Ants!]

Wolf
BBQ Sauce
Nicknames for spotted dick
Vasectomies

The path of this thread so far. Not sure if I missed some steps.

 

[dimmerwit]

Well, my wife was so appreciative she ordered pasta from a fancy restaurant (not Olive Garden) and served it to me in bed. Pasta is my favorite food. So that was something.

I remember reading how Olive Garden didn't salt their pasta because they could get longer warranties on the pots.

 

[Ben]

I'm pretty good at disassociating. When I had to have some teeth pulled they were all "raise your hand if you need a break" and I didn't move until they were done.

I'm also more likely to laugh when in pain, to the point the Mrs will know when I hurt myself because I won't be able to stop smiling.

Having a weird brain helps sometimes.

Still, I'd expect it to not feel good.

 

[Ben]

I'll tell ya, back when I got mine, they asked a lot of personal questions about having kids and stuff and they were like "are you sure? Are you sure? Are you sure?" And then finally the doctor was like "okay so you've had one kid and you're done, eh?" And I had hit 40 and have three other kids that aren't biologically mine, so finally they went ahead with it.

So messed up like I had to talk them into giving me "permission" to take the procedure.

I imagine what women go through must be ten times worse.

I'm just going to show them the moths in my wallet when they ask if I'm sure.