Aims waves the leggy around at Zesty's direction.
Hey tiefling. Could you do me a solid and fire roast this leggy for me? I could eat it raw, but it's not like I'm barbaric like that, hahaha!
Errrr.... I don't get that saying. I am a barbarian after all, but I like my food nicely done. Crispy is often optimal.
Hey tiefling. Could you do me a solid and fire roast this leggy for me? I could eat it raw, but it's not like I'm barbaric like that, hahaha!
Errrr.... I don't get that saying. I am a barbarian after all, but I like my food nicely done. Crispy is often optimal.
The orc's humor not amusing Zesty, he breaks from his investigation of the central figure to respond.
Remember what happened the last time you ate a sentient creature, orc. If you want to wash those pants, you'll be needing a 30 foot dive.
Zesty walks to the dragon statues on the southwest, near where the magical bridge is illuminated still.
Zesty checks the dragon statues in this area.
((@Ben - I'm ASSUMING those are more dragon statues. I'm basing it on the picture below. I know the purple ones are from originally. So since they have the same symbol on the map, I assume the red ones are the same thing. Being there is a fog of war there and it looks like this could be another bridge area, Jon is curious lol
))
Remember what happened the last time you ate a sentient creature, orc. If you want to wash those pants, you'll be needing a 30 foot dive.
Zesty walks to the dragon statues on the southwest, near where the magical bridge is illuminated still.
Zesty checks the dragon statues in this area.
((@Ben - I'm ASSUMING those are more dragon statues. I'm basing it on the picture below. I know the purple ones are from originally. So since they have the same symbol on the map, I assume the red ones are the same thing. Being there is a fog of war there and it looks like this could be another bridge area, Jon is curious lol
))
The orc's humor not amusing Zesty, he breaks from his investigation of the central figure to respond.
Remember what happened the last time you ate a sentient creature, orc. If you want to wash those pants, you'll be needing a 30 foot dive.
Zesty walks to the dragon statues on the southwest, near where the magical bridge is illuminated still.
Zesty checks the dragon statues in this area.
((@Ben - I'm ASSUMING those are more dragon statues. I'm basing it on the picture below. I know the purple ones are from originally. So since they have the same symbol on the map, I assume the red ones are the same thing. Being there is a fog of war there and it looks like this could be another bridge area, Jon is curious lol
))
| These statutes, which are similar up to the ones on the cliff, also feature a hexagonal hole in the base. |
The statues intrigue Zesty. He notices the same hexagonal design and knows the key Runara gave him would fit here. Would another bridge appear? How to retrieve the key, though?
He could use the rope and crossbow to find a way across? No... would take to long to rig something up.
He could ask the orc to throw thehorse gnome? Maybe if the gnome were a mouse? No... getting back across would be impossible.
He could ask the fucking flying kobolds? Why not!? It's not like they are allegiant to a fucking dragon or anything!
Mek, Minn. I used a small hexagonal key with a dragon head to activate the bridge over here from the west. Do you think it'd be possible for one of you to fly over there and retrieve the key for me?
Zesty asks the fucking flying kobolds for help.
He could use the rope and crossbow to find a way across? No... would take to long to rig something up.
He could ask the orc to throw the
He could ask the fucking flying kobolds? Why not!? It's not like they are allegiant to a fucking dragon or anything!
Mek, Minn. I used a small hexagonal key with a dragon head to activate the bridge over here from the west. Do you think it'd be possible for one of you to fly over there and retrieve the key for me?
Zesty asks the fucking flying kobolds for help.
The statues intrigue Zesty. He notices the same hexagonal design and knows the key Runara gave him would fit here. Would another bridge appear? How to retrieve the key, though?
He could use the rope and crossbow to find a way across? No... would take to long to rig something up.
He could ask the orc to throw thehorsegnome? Maybe if the gnome were a mouse? No... getting back across would be impossible.
He could ask the fucking flying kobolds? Why not!? It's not like they are allegiant to a fucking dragon or anything!
Mek, Minn. I used a small hexagonal key with a dragon head to activate the bridge over here from the west. Do you think it'd be possible for one of you to fly over there and retrieve the key for me?
Zesty asks the fucking flying kobolds for help.
| "Sure, Mister! We glad old bronze tits Runara not got key anymore anyway."
The two kobolds leap into the air and high-five.
"Fucking flying kobolds!"

They chant the designation as they flap across the observatory, out the Western doorway, over the bridge and pull the keystone out of the statue. The energy ceases and the bridge dissipates again.
The two brothers flap back into the observatory and throw the key at Zesty.
"Yeet." |
Zesty crosses theBifrostbridge with Boltzmann.
| You cross the shimmering pathway.
The rhythm of the waves below echoes throughout this cramped tower. Part of the floor has crumbled away, dropping off into a chamber below. Amid the rubble, collapsed bookcases jut out at odd angles, and moldering books are strewn across the floor.

The majority of books seem to have fallen apart, but one tome--a small black journal with an ornate lock--remains intact. |
As Zesty crosses into the room and notices all the decayed books, the one remaining intact book catches his attention. The lock, the artificer notices, makes this book unlike the other, and he suspects something magical about it. As Aims crosses the threshold into the room, he picks up the book and briefly examines the lock to see if there is a way to open it.
Do be careful, orc. I am not sure any of us would be able to lift you out of the hole should you fall.
Zesty examines the lock on the book.
Do be careful, orc. I am not sure any of us would be able to lift you out of the hole should you fall.
Zesty examines the lock on the book.
Books! Bah! Never did anyone any good ever. Well, once they did help me start a fire. Kind of awkward to carry around for tinder. There's trees everywhere for that! Why carry a book.
Aims walks over to take a peep down below.
| You peer down into the crumbled section of the tower. The base of it is full of debris and unfortunate bookshelves that succumbed to gravity. It does not appears as though there is anything useful below. |
((How exactly are you examining that, pray-tell?))As Zesty crosses into the room and notices all the decayed books, the one remaining intact book catches his attention. The lock, the artificer notices, makes this book unlike the other, and he suspects something magical about it. As Aims crosses the threshold into the room, he picks up the book and briefly examines the lock to see if there is a way to open it.
Do be careful, orc. I am not sure any of us would be able to lift you out of the hole should you fall.
Zesty examines the lock on the book.
((With... my eyes? I feel like this is a trick or leading question lol. Like you want me to say something specific. Can my arcana checks find wards or anything on the lock? I don't have my detect magic equipped because I thought Short Order did. So unless arcana can find something magical, I suppose a simple investigation/perception of the lock.((How exactly are you examining that, pray-tell?))
If that's what you're asking anyway.))
((Me? Leading questions? Never. Gimme Perception first, though.))((With... my eyes? I feel like this is a trick or leading question lol. Like you want me to say something specific. Can my arcana checks find wards or anything on the lock? I don't have my detect magic equipped because I thought Short Order did. So unless arcana can find something magical, I suppose a simple investigation/perception of the lock.
If that's what you're asking anyway.))
Well, that was a load of nothing. I'm going to fly back over there!
Aims "flies" back over to the main room and goes to look what happens on the other side of the rope bridge.
While Aims is crossing the bridge, Moonsprout, feeling particularly impish, decides to give the orc a taste of his own medicine and gives the key a quick turn "off" before turning it back on again.
((
While Aims is crossing the bridge, Moonsprout, feeling particularly impish, decides to give the orc a taste of his own medicine and gives the key a quick turn "off" before turning it back on again.


((@Jawneh roll me a STR-Athletics.))
((Me? Leading questions? Never. Gimme Perception first, though.))
((I dunno how I let my perception be so shitty lol))
I believe I can fly~!((@Jawneh roll me a STR-Athletics.))
((
You didn't use paranthesis so that's canon in character what he says now.))

You didn't use paranthesis so that's canon in character what he says now.))
((Oh shit, I should tell you about the book before I forget though. It'll take me a hot minute to properly emphasize upon you all the gravity of Aims situation.))
| You inspect the book more closely and notice a small arcane rune engraved above the keyhole.
|
((I will need an Arcana check to see if you know anything about the rune.))
((I dunno how I let my perception be so shitty lol))
| You inspect the book more closely and notice a small arcane rune engraved above the keyhole.

((I will need an Arcana check to see if you know anything about the rune.))
((Dicks out for Harambe. Cocks up for Aims'Orreh. May he be alive in the morning...
Guess I'm back to the shitty rolls then...))
| You while you can tell it's an arcane rune, you have no familiarity with this particular one, or any others similar to it.
You can't say what it means at all. |
((I didn't go to sleep.))
| Your flight spell ends abruptly.

You signal to Moonsprout the direction in which you would rather be moving. Up.

You dive for the rope that Zesty throws to you.

You catch it, but unfortunately Zesty isn't able to hold your enormous 450lb ass, and you fall anyway.

You hit the surface of the water hard.

You are now in the ocean 30 ft below.
|
| Your flight spell ends abruptly.

You signal to Moonsprout the direction in which you would rather be moving. Up.

You dive for the rope that Zesty throws to you.

You catch it, but unfortunately Zesty isn't able to hold your enormous 450lb ass, and you fall anyway.

You hit the surface of the water hard.

You are now in the ocean 30 ft below.

Zesty rushes to the edge of the ruined tower and looks to the water. His recency bias against Aims' dissipating because, even though the circumstances hurt Zesty, he's still fiercely loyal to the team he's been fighting with. His hands running red with rope burn, he yells out to the mountain of an orc that fell 30 feet to the water. That must have felt like hitting concrete, he thought to himself.
AIMS'! ARE YOU ALIVE!?
He looks up to Moonsprout standing at the opposite end.
D'ya think maybe you can put the key back in and NOT touch it again, buddy?
This is why Runara entrusted the key to me, Zesty thinks to himself. Between the drunk, the oaf, the imbecile, the homicidal maniac and Zesty, there was only option where her request stood a chance.
All that being true, Zesty continues in his mind, and all things that have happened recently, there is still not a group I would rather be facing this challenge with.
Until that blue dragon I saw eats us because Moonsprout tries to kiss it, Aims' tries to ride it, Short tries to run it over or Nac tries to ask it for an ale... He chuckles a little to himself, even though their fate may be sealed because those things have a greater than zero likelihood of happening.
Back to reality, Aims' fate still yet unknown, and the bridge still out, Zesty places the book into his backpack. Perhaps the Druid can recognize the rune before we just snap this thing open. He rolls the rope he couldn't hold back up and places that on the strap on his bag.
AIMS! IF YOU LIVE, TRY TO FIND A WAY BACK UP!
Moonsprout, the bridge, if you will?
AIMS'! ARE YOU ALIVE!?
He looks up to Moonsprout standing at the opposite end.
D'ya think maybe you can put the key back in and NOT touch it again, buddy?
This is why Runara entrusted the key to me, Zesty thinks to himself. Between the drunk, the oaf, the imbecile, the homicidal maniac and Zesty, there was only option where her request stood a chance.
All that being true, Zesty continues in his mind, and all things that have happened recently, there is still not a group I would rather be facing this challenge with.
Until that blue dragon I saw eats us because Moonsprout tries to kiss it, Aims' tries to ride it, Short tries to run it over or Nac tries to ask it for an ale... He chuckles a little to himself, even though their fate may be sealed because those things have a greater than zero likelihood of happening.
Back to reality, Aims' fate still yet unknown, and the bridge still out, Zesty places the book into his backpack. Perhaps the Druid can recognize the rune before we just snap this thing open. He rolls the rope he couldn't hold back up and places that on the strap on his bag.
AIMS! IF YOU LIVE, TRY TO FIND A WAY BACK UP!
Moonsprout, the bridge, if you will?
Aims is splashing around frantically. The usually more calm and collected.... or the usually more excited and bloodthirsty half-orc is now in a miserable state of wet and terror. The sorry bastard can't swim. And to make things worse, his dick also hurts like a mofo from hitting and breaking the surface of the water for him. It's taking all of Aims' 6 braincells not to give into the basic instinct of grabbing your dick when it hurts and instead keep trying to stay on top of the water.
... which is easier said than done when you're build like a boulder the size of a small boulder. At least that's what someone told him that the birds were saying.
Help! Heeeeelp! Gulp... Aaahhhh! Dick! Water! Noooo! Help!
He never got to eat his leggy snack and is feeling very out of it too. Not enough energy to splash around. It'll be soon when he needs learn how to breathe under water.
... which is easier said than done when you're build like a boulder the size of a small boulder. At least that's what someone told him that the birds were saying.
Help! Heeeeelp! Gulp... Aaahhhh! Dick! Water! Noooo! Help!
He never got to eat his leggy snack and is feeling very out of it too. Not enough energy to splash around. It'll be soon when he needs learn how to breathe under water.
Nac, realising he might be the only one strong enough to help Big Green, almost without thinking bolts towards the edge where the half-orc fell.
Tie the rope to sumtin' sturdy and toss it down! he shouts to the others while throwing his rope to the floor.
Nac leaps off the edge into a dive down towards the water with the flailing half-orc
Tie the rope to sumtin' sturdy and toss it down! he shouts to the others while throwing his rope to the floor.
Nac leaps off the edge into a dive down towards the water with the flailing half-orc
((Been a busy one. Had to withstand socializing to take my daughter to a birthday party.
So whether or not Aims can literally not swim is up to @Jawneh. If you want it for the (literal) immersion, sure.
Otherwise I'd say climbing up isn't too hard, especially with the rope. I'm inclined to not even make you roll, as it's just burning time while you potentially keep falling back in.
I'm trying to get past kid dinner, then I'll sit down at my desk and bust out some continuation.))
So whether or not Aims can literally not swim is up to @Jawneh. If you want it for the (literal) immersion, sure.
Otherwise I'd say climbing up isn't too hard, especially with the rope. I'm inclined to not even make you roll, as it's just burning time while you potentially keep falling back in.
I'm trying to get past kid dinner, then I'll sit down at my desk and bust out some continuation.))
((First, have fun with child activities. At least parties also feed the parents. If they don't, I'd start talking shit about them on FB or something.((Been a busy one. Had to withstand socializing to take my daughter to a birthday party.
So whether or not Aims can literally not swim is up to @Jawneh. If you want it for the (literal) immersion, sure.
Otherwise I'd say climbing up isn't too hard, especially with the rope. I'm inclined to not even make you roll, as it's just burning time while you potentially keep falling back in.
I'm trying to get past kid dinner, then I'll sit down at my desk and bust out some continuation.))
Second, yes, the poor sod is too thick to swim. In both sense of the word lol.
Third, with Nac in the drink with me and rope soon coming down, don't got to make things take longer. Aims didn't get skewered by a sharp piece of rock or something on the way down, so no worries. Just a cock getting slammed.))
Sorry, I, uh, thought I activated the bridge again. I guess that part happened only in my head? Finger must've slipped while turning the key.Moonsprout, the bridge, if you will?
Moonsprout doesn't reactivate the bridge and walks to the edge of the cliff to stare down at Aims climbing angrily out of the water.
Hey there big green! Sorry about that! I guess we shouldn't mess around with magical-looking keys in statues too much, huh? Anyway, think of this as an opportunity to wash off some of that kobold gore you're covered in!
((First, have fun with child activities. At least parties also feed the parents. If they don't, I'd start talking shit about them on FB or something.
Second, yes, the poor sod is too thick to swim. In both sense of the word lol.
Third, with Nac in the drink with me and rope soon coming down, don't got to make things take longer. Aims didn't get skewered by a sharp piece of rock or something on the way down, so no worries. Just a cock getting slammed.))
| Compelled to help your comrade, your body jerks into action without your brain's engagement.
You believe you courageously dive from the tower like a heroic eagle.

It's more like an inebriated turkey.

You believe you gracefully land in the water.

But it's more like on Aims' face.

You momentarily push the half-orc under again. |
| If only your middle-finger were enchanted with flight, but alas, you're flipping a flightless bird.


Aims' used Splash. It's not very effective.

Eventually you manage to flop your way through the water, carefully pushed by the drunky monky, and your hands find the rope secured above. With a lot of effort and dripping, you make your way up the tower wall.

You exclaim, "I hurt my cock!

This makes you think of your lost pet, and a new wave of non-penis-related-grief washes over you.

|

You reactivate the bridge.

| "Oh, by way, bridge turn off when remove key." |
((CHRONOLOGICAL FUCKERY!))
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((I liked my Drunken Monken betterdrunky monky

Zesty and Boltzmann cross back over the bridge. He places a hand on Aims' shoulder and nods his head before turning around and taking the key from the statue again. He places it in his backpack.
I'm taking this. And no one else touch the fucking key...
With that, Zesty walks over to Short Order. He retrieves the book with the rune inscribed on it and hands it to the gnome.
Do you think you can identify this rune? This book is the only thing left intact over there and I am willing to bet it is important. This lock seems magical in nature as there is a rune, but I could not identify it. Perhaps you'll have a better chance before we just tear it open.
As Short Order looks over the book, Zesty turnsto Mek and Minn.
Could you tell us what the two areas to the north are? Zesty indicates the northwest area with an apparent wooden bridge, and the northeast area through the rubble.
((Jesus christ... I'm over here merging posts to shift timestamps and retconing shit, and you you're just "Oh i doesn't do that"((Fixed the time hiccup))

I'll just leave it this way, Moonsprout can have turned the bridge back on.))
Holy heck has it been a sorry day for a sorry orc ass. First his newly found mount decides not to cooperate, no matter now much their bloodthirsts matched up. Then he doesn't get to eat a nicely charcoaled leggy. And lastly he nearly went to swim with the fishes for forever while his dick was throbbing from pain. Not the good kind of pain either. Ugh.
I'm not feeling so good...
He undoes his belt and makes sure his cock is alright.
... you know, it hurts like a sumbitch, but maybe some of that throbbing and swelling will be permanent?
I could use a drink though. And food. Man, how can we be adventuring without any alcohol around. Sigh...
He puts his belt back on and while holding his recently wet willy, he walks over to lean against the whatever thingamajig in the middle of the room while catching his breath. And soothing his orchood.
I'm not feeling so good...
He undoes his belt and makes sure his cock is alright.
... you know, it hurts like a sumbitch, but maybe some of that throbbing and swelling will be permanent?
I could use a drink though. And food. Man, how can we be adventuring without any alcohol around. Sigh...
He puts his belt back on and while holding his recently wet willy, he walks over to lean against the whatever thingamajig in the middle of the room while catching his breath. And soothing his orchood.
((I liked my Drunken Monken better))
Zesty and Boltzmann cross back over the bridge. He places a hand on Aims' shoulder and nods his head before turning around and taking the key from the statue again. He places it in his backpack.
I'm taking this. And no one else touch the fucking key...
With that, Zesty walks over to Short Order. He retrieves the book with the rune inscribed on it and hands it to the gnome.
Do you think you can identify this rune? This book is the only thing left intact over there and I am willing to bet it is important. This lock seems magical in nature as there is a rune, but I could not identify it. Perhaps you'll have a better chance before we just tear it open.
As Short Order looks over the book, Zesty turnsto Mek and Minn.
Could you tell us what the two areas to the north are? Zesty indicates the northwest area with an apparent wooden bridge, and the northeast area through the rubble.
| The kobold points towards the rope bridge to the North West. "That way, kobold camp! Stay there when SPARKRENDER not have task for kobolds."
The kobold turns and points to the North East, where the floor of the adjacent tower is about 15 feet higher than the rotunda you now stand in, and there is a roughly constructed pulley system with a basket. "That tower, SPARKRENDER throne! We make elevator for walky kobolds when summoned by boss!" |
((

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