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Rank the Fast Food Pizzas

Jon

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Not all pickles are created equal
Shame Facepalm GIF by MOODMAN
 

shortkut

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1. They are not pineapple
2. You can remove the moisture without impacting the texture or taste of the pickle too much, allowing you to not harm the structural/physical integrity of the pizza
3. There are different varieties of pickles such as half-sour, garlic-flavored, etc., to avoid an extremely strong flavor overpowering the flavor of the cheese/sauce/combo
4. Pickles are not be the main focus of the toppings, they are complementary to the other toppings. Pineapples are the focus when they are used, ham is the complement used, not the other way around

This took 10 seconds to think of and I hate pickles. I’d sooner eat pineapple on its own than pickles
 

Jon

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1. They are not pineapple
2. You can remove the moisture without impacting the texture or taste of the pickle too much, allowing you to not harm the structural/physical integrity of the pizza
3. There are different varieties of pickles such as half-sour, garlic-flavored, etc., to avoid an extremely strong flavor overpowering the flavor of the cheese/sauce/combo
4. Pickles are not be the main focus of the toppings, they are complementary to the other toppings. Pineapples are the focus when they are used, ham is the complement used, not the other way around

This took 10 seconds to think of and I hate pickles. I’d sooner eat pineapple on its own than pickles
I hear your words. I simply disagree. To each their own.
 

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You voluntarily chose to live in Florida

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Saying that pineapple doesn't belong on pizza sounds like a child not wanting to eat their vegetables because of unrefined palates and weak minds manipulated by propaganda.

Pineapple is the fruit that eats you as you eat it. That's metal as fuck. Maybe you're just scared of the most badass fruit in existence.

Pineapple has other advantages too, aside from nutritional and taste. Well, taste is still involved. There's a reason I stock a ton of cut pineapple on the shelves for Valentine's Day, I'm just sayin'.
 

A PineSol Scent

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View attachment 12544


Saying that pineapple doesn't belong on pizza sounds like a child not wanting to eat their vegetables because of unrefined palates and weak minds manipulated by propaganda.

Pineapple is the fruit that eats you as you eat it. That's metal as fuck. Maybe you're just scared of the most badass fruit in existence.

Pineapple has other advantages too, aside from nutritional and taste. Well, taste is still involved. There's a reason I stock a ton of cut pineapple on the shelves for Valentine's Day, I'm just sayin'.
The picture on that article looks like the pizza is upside down.
 

Jon

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View attachment 12544


Saying that pineapple doesn't belong on pizza sounds like a child not wanting to eat their vegetables because of unrefined palates and weak minds manipulated by propaganda.

Pineapple is the fruit that eats you as you eat it. That's metal as fuck. Maybe you're just scared of the most badass fruit in existence.

Pineapple has other advantages too, aside from nutritional and taste. Well, taste is still involved. There's a reason I stock a ton of cut pineapple on the shelves for Valentine's Day, I'm just sayin'.
Arnold Schwarzenegger Handshake GIF
 

shortkut

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View attachment 12544


Saying that pineapple doesn't belong on pizza sounds like a child not wanting to eat their vegetables because of unrefined palates and weak minds manipulated by propaganda.

Pineapple is the fruit that eats you as you eat it. That's metal as fuck. Maybe you're just scared of the most badass fruit in existence.

Pineapple has other advantages too, aside from nutritional and taste. Well, taste is still involved. There's a reason I stock a ton of cut pineapple on the shelves for Valentine's Day, I'm just sayin'.
Issues with the article
  1. Claims it is a salty/sweet combination. Pizza is not supposed to taste salty. They are claiming sodium exists in tomato sauce, therefore, adding pineapple is making a sweet/salty combination
  2. “pineapple is healthy” is not a reason to put it on pizza. Tomatoes themselves are high in vitamin c and have comparable levels of both manganese and vitamin c to pineapple, per 100 gm.
  3. Those are the only two points the article has
  4. The AI argument I shared was better written and researched than this joke of an article
 

Jon

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Just order capybara scat and put that on your pizza. The capybara eats its own fecal matter to aid in digestion, so it must be good to put on pizza
I mean if someone WANTS to do it, then power to them. I, personally, have no desire. I've watched Jackass, I know how that turns out.
 
*NOTE* Full disclosure, I fully acknowledge and agree that real, fresh made pizza in proper ovens in ma and pop shops trumps fast food pizza, but we can't rate them because we can't all get to taste those ones...so...QSR it is!

Talking about the QSRs, Pizza Hut, Papa Johns, etc... Let's rank them!

We'll include the following chains: Domino's, Pizza Hut, Papa Johns, Little Caesars, Marco's Pizza, Mod Pizza, Hungry Howie's, Jets Pizza, Blaze Pizza, California Pizza Kitchen

What's your take?

My list:

  1. Jets Pizza -- I know most won't see this as number one, but it's the closest to "real" pizza on this list, and it's a decent Detroit style!
  2. Domino's -- Their pan pizza is nice.
  3. Hungry Howies -- I acknowledge the pizza isn't super tasty, but those crusts!!
  4. Little Caesars -- Ok, here me out here, their thin crust is decent.
  5. Marco's Pizza -- We lost ours around here, so...it slips down the list. It was nice!
  6. Pizza Hut -- It's...well, it's Pizza Hut.
  7. Mod Pizza -- Subway, eat pizza
  8. Blaze Pizza -- see above
  9. California Pizza Kitchen -- Meh.
  10. Papa Johns -- Get some flavour, please.

Papa Johns destroys Pizza Hutt IMO, the garlic sauce is so good

Jets I can live with as a top fast food , also LC isnt too bad for the price, those hot and readys
 

shortkut

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I was talking to a coworker, and I almost had to start looking for another job because she puts pineapple on pizza… but then she said something interesting:

It can only go on dominoes or similar quality pizza, not real pizza from a pizzeria.

That got me to thinking: are dominoes and the like, not actually pizza?

Dominos Avoid GIF by Domino's Pizza
 

VashTheStampede

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Just order capybara scat and put that on your pizza. The capybara eats its own fecal matter to aid in digestion, so it must be good to put on pizza

Okay so the word "capybara" reminded me of my favorite pizza place that's not in NYC.

It's a Brazilian pizza place in South Florida that uses catupiry cheese and it is AMAZING.

Nothing to do with pineapple, just fond pizza memories.
 

shortkut

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Okay so the word "capybara" reminded me of my favorite pizza place that's not in NYC.

It's a Brazilian pizza place in South Florida that uses catupiry cheese and it is AMAZING.

Nothing to do with pineapple, just fond pizza memories.
When I did a quick google search, it showed that cheese as spreadable. Is that the only way it comes? I’m curious what it would do to the texture/mouth-feel of the pizza
 

VashTheStampede

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When I did a quick google search, it showed that cheese as spreadable. Is that the only way it comes? I’m curious what it would do to the texture/mouth-feel of the pizza
Honestly at this place I didn't notice any textural difference, and I'm usually very susceptible to texture issues in foods.
 

shortkut

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No, that's why this thread makes such a distinction. They're like lunchables that you bake. Pizza is crafted. Lovingly. By hairy men from Italy or Albania (no idea why, most of the mom and pop places here are owned by Albanians)
In that case, pineapple is allowed on whatever cardboard people order from these chains
 
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View attachment 12544


Saying that pineapple doesn't belong on pizza sounds like a child not wanting to eat their vegetables because of unrefined palates and weak minds manipulated by propaganda.

Pineapple is the fruit that eats you as you eat it. That's metal as fuck. Maybe you're just scared of the most badass fruit in existence.

Pineapple has other advantages too, aside from nutritional and taste. Well, taste is still involved. There's a reason I stock a ton of cut pineapple on the shelves for Valentine's Day, I'm just sayin'.
Ric Flair GIF by hero0fwar
 
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