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Part of me was hoping that you did this for a gag because that was the exact thing I thought of when I saw this thread.These are my pants. Grey, subtle houndstooth patterning. I likely got them at Marks and Spencer -- their clothes are high quality and last for ages.
edit: misread the title
My longest laster is a cactus which I bought 15 years ago and eventually gave to my parents. They don’t remember to water it so I water it when I visit them every 5-8 months. Somehow that’s enough to keep it kicking.