Other Need some help identifying this picture

[Gloom-is-good]

Congratulations! Totally unexpected. I thought it was going to be some kind of puzzle

@Crystal and @Rachel I'm happy to help with shower gift as well!

 

[A Baby Maker]

Congratulations! Totally unexpected. I thought it was going to be some kind of puzzle

@Crystal and @Rachel I'm happy to help with shower gift as well!

 

[Crystal]

@Crystal and @Rachel I'm happy to help with shower gift as well!

Yay, let's do it. 6,000 packs of diapers incoming!

 

[A Baby Maker]

Yay, let's do it. 6,000 packs of diapers incoming!

That'll last about a week from what I hear

 

[Crystal]

That'll last about a week from what I hear

If you're lucky!

 

[dimmerwit]

I hear infants are essentially a fecal SMG.

 

[Mark]

Greatest list of names ever created.

“Anatoli Smorin” is up there for future you.

 

[Ben]

Congratulations! Surprise was spoiled by name change, but after the "A Baby Maker" I came looking for this thread.

You're definitely not prepared. No one is prepared. Even if you think you're prepared, you aren't.

Just know it's your job to go to your wife whatever she craves in the middle of the night.

Got it. So mix Taiwanese and Western European/French Canadian heritages together.

My child, Poutine Noodle Soup.

You jest, but I've mentioned it before, I had a landlord named Howard Yee, who named their son "Princehoward Barbeque Yee".

Deering High student won’t be allowed to play varsity baseball, judge rules

Princehoward Yee, who lives in Falmouth, transferred to the Portland school earlier this year.

www.pressherald.com

I think he has another son he named "Bao Bao".

Moral of the story is, don't name your children after restaurants you own.

 

[A Baby Maker]

Definitely not going to go with Bao Bao. We say that to our dog as a trick for her to come hug us.

 

[Ben]

Definitely not going to go with Bao Bao. We say that to our dog as a trick for her to come hug us.

I believe it means dumpling. Or, at least is used as such.

That might be secondary to 'embrace' or 'hug', whatever the original use was.

 

[A Baby Maker]

I believe it means dumpling. Or, at least is used as such.

That might be secondary to 'embrace' or 'hug', whatever the original use was.

It's a kind of steamed bun similar to dumpling, but when voiced differently it means hug. Typically repeated and said to kids to say "give me a hug!"

 

[Ben]

It's a kind of steamed bun similar to dumpling, but when voiced differently it means hug. Typically repeated and said to kids to say "give me a hug!"

Word.

Still a dumb thing to name a human.

 

[A Baby Maker]

Word.

Still a dumb thing to name a human.

Correct.

Grilled Cheese come get your dinner!

 

[shortkut]

Who is Alu15?

 

[Crystal]

Damn. I added it to see how long it would take anyone to notice...about 2 seconds, apparently, lol.

 

[A Baby Maker]

Who is Alu15?

View attachment 27745

14 year old me

 

[shortkut]

14 year old me

Spoiler

i was being facetious

 

[Jon]

Thanks for the announcement! I missed this!

Congrats bigtime, @Alu!

 

[shortkut]

Stop changing the announcement on me

 

[Crystal]

Stop changing the announcement on me

View attachment 27751

I changed it the second you noticed my little easter egg. I wanted it to last longer than that...so...meh.

 

[Nae'blis]

I changed it the second you noticed my little easter egg. I wanted it to last longer than that...so...meh.

Future name change: An Easter Egg Person

 

[Smacktard]

Hey Alu, how about these suggestions

If it's a girl? Artea.
Boy? Aguro.

Big congrats though. I know I haven't said much when you revealed the news, but I have so many things I've been wondering and don't know how to ask... Feel free to ignore any that you think are too personal.

Do you plan on teaching them Mandarin? How are you going to manage that? At what age will you start?

How will you and Sheryl manage work with the baby? Who will be taking time off work, for how long, how/when will they get back to work, etc.?

What are you doing to prepare for the dadlife?

Are you increasing your dad joke repertoire?

how is babby formed??

 

[Fool's Requiem]

how is babby formed??

 

[A Baby Maker]

Hey Alu, how about these suggestions

If it's a girl? Artea.
Boy? Aguro.

Big congrats though. I know I haven't said much when you revealed the news, but I have so many things I've been wondering and don't know how to ask... Feel free to ignore any that you think are too personal.

Do you plan on teaching them Mandarin? How are you going to manage that? At what age will you start?

How will you and Sheryl manage work with the baby? Who will be taking time off work, for how long, how/when will they get back to work, etc.?

What are you doing to prepare for the dadlife?

Are you increasing your dad joke repertoire?

how is babby formed??

Artea is a boy too! He's just an elf. Though they changed the spelling to Arty in the second game, which would actually also be my grandfather's name.

Mandarin: yes, there's bilingual daycare options here that are close. Sheryl and her parents will also be talking to the baby in Mandarin as often as they can.

Sheryl will get like 4 months of maternity leave, and I'll get 2 months of paternity. I work from home, so I'll probably need to figure things out for when there's no daycare.

Home renovations is how we're currently preparing.

I've been increasing my dad joke repertoire for as long as I've been able to talk.

IVF.

 

[Smacktard]

Artea is a boy too! He's just an elf. Though they changed the spelling to Arty in the second game, which would actually also be my grandfather's name

I just looked up Lufia names and chose the ones that started with A lolz but yes it seems that Artea is the correct choice if you have a boy. You're welcome

Mandarin: yes, there's bilingual daycare options here that are close. Sheryl and her parents will also be talking to the baby in Mandarin as often as they can

Bilingual day care for Mandarin? I never would've imagined. That's awesome.

Sheryl will get like 4 months of maternity leave, and I'll get 2 months of paternity. I work from home, so I'll probably need to figure things out for when there's no daycare.

Is it 6 months split between the two of you, or do each of your workplaces offer independent mat/pat leave? I think in Canada it's 12 months which can be split between husband and wife

 

[A Baby Maker]

My two months will overlap with her first two months. So sadly not 6 months in a row.

There's also a chance her mom comes over from across the county for the first month. Taiwanese thing there.

 

[A Baby Maker]

Also yes on the daycare. There are obviously a lot more in SoCal, but there are actually about 4 of them within 15 minutes of where we live. Two of them are dumb as hell expensive though. Like more than our mortgage expensive.

 

[Mark]

My two months will overlap with her first two months. So sadly not 6 months in a row.

There's also a chance her mom comes over from across the county for the first month. Taiwanese thing there.

I’ve read similar about some other Asian cultures regarding marriage and pregnancy… I can’t recall which, but one has the grandmother live in-house for up to a year, and another has the husband live with family/the in-laws live with the newlyweds after marriage.

 

[dimmerwit]

Yeah I'd start construction of the granny annex right away.

 

[A Baby Maker]

My office is also the guest bedroom, and I won't be using it during that time. We'll be good.

 

[Ants!]

Suck -1

 

[shortkut]

Sheryl will get like 4 months of maternity leave, and I'll get 2 months of paternity. I work from home, so I'll probably need to figure things out for when there's no daycare

Company provided parental leave is not the same as FMLA. You should be entitled to both. The issue with FMLA for bonding time is that it has to be taken consecutively. You might be able to stay home for 2 months, then go back to work, then take 12 weeks off

 

[A Baby Maker]

Company provided parental leave is not the same as FMLA. You should be entitled to both. The issue with FMLA for bonding time is that it has to be taken consecutively. You might be able to stay home for 2 months, then go back to work, then take 12 weeks off

I was just talking about paid time off there. Not sure I'll be able to swing anything unpaid.

 

[shortkut]

I was just talking about paid time off there. Not sure I'll be able to swing anything unpaid.

Most states pay for FMLA and it is anywhere from 50-80% of the salary you were making up to a certain amount. You also don’t have to take it immediately. I believe you have up to a year to start it, so you can only do a few weeks if you need it

 

[shortkut]

https://www.mass.gov/info-details/pfml-about-family-leave-to-bond-with-a-child

https://www.mass.gov/info-details/paid-family-and-medical-leave-pfml-overview-and-benefits

In 2025, the maximum weekly benefit is $1,170.64.

 

[Ben]

I believe in Maine I had to use up all of my PTO before I could take FMLA.

It looks like in Massachusetts, you can use PTO to "top up" the amount PFLA pays, concurrently.

 

[A Baby Maker]

I believe in Maine I had to use up all of my PTO before I could take FMLA.

It looks like in Massachusetts, you can use PTO to "top up" the amount PFLA pays, concurrently.

I have unlimited PTO, so I can't really use that all up before using more.

 

[Ben]

I have unlimited PTO, so I can't really use that all up before using more.

I guess technically I do too, being salaried, but still get a set amount of PTO for the year. Enough that I was able to take off every other Friday for the entire year and still have some left over, but not truly unlimited.

Unlimited PTO just sounds like "don't come to work ever" territory.

 

[A Baby Maker]

Okay. I found what appears to be the most recent employee handbook, which is from 2021 (but on a page where the only other document is from September last year, so plausibly the most up to date one). It says 14 weeks fully paid leave with up to 12 additional weeks of unpaid leave. MA policy wouldn't come into effect because it would be concurrent to the company policy time.

I hope that's accurate. That's a full month more than I thought it would be.

 

[shortkut]

Okay. I found what appears to be the most recent employee handbook, which is from 2021 (but on a page where the only other document is from September last year, so plausibly the most up to date one). It says 14 weeks fully paid leave with up to 12 additional weeks of unpaid leave. MA policy wouldn't come into effect because it would be concurrent to the company policy time.

I hope that's accurate. That's a full month more than I thought it would be.

Reach out to whomever your provider is before the company. Lincoln financial or unum or whomever. They have all the information about the leave allowances

 

[Christina]

Congratulations!!!

 

[Kat]

Congrats, Alu!

Hahaha right

Can we come up with A names now

Alu's kids in ten years: "Dad, why do all of our names start with A?" Have fun explaining that one.

I guess technically I do too, being salaried, but still get a set amount of PTO for the year. Enough that I was able to take off every other Friday for the entire year and still have some left over, but not truly unlimited.

Unlimited PTO just sounds like "don't come to work ever" territory.

Last I looked it up, if you are salaried, they can still deduct from your pay if you take an entire working day off. So you wouldn't still get your salary if you took weeks off (unless the company chose to pay you, of course). Legally they aren't supposed to dock your pay if you work a half day or something like that, but they have their ways, as I'm sure you've experienced.

Counter intuitively, a lot of companies with "unlimited" PTO actively discourage using any PTO, so people often end up taking less vacation than if they had a limit. Hopefully that's not the sort of place A Baby Maker is at.

 

[Ben]

Last I looked it up, if you are salaried, they can still deduct from your pay if you take an entire working day off. So you wouldn't still get your salary if you took weeks off (unless the company chose to pay you, of course). Legally they aren't supposed to dock your pay if you work a half day or something like that, but they have their ways, as I'm sure you've experienced.

Counter intuitively, a lot of companies with "unlimited" PTO actively discourage using any PTO, so people often end up taking less vacation than if they had a limit. Hopefully that's not the sort of place A Baby Maker is at.

Sure, that's probably the law or something. I'd say it depends how attentive your boss/HR are to that kind of shit. In my experience, no one notices if you don't actually submit PTO for a sick day, or... months of FMLA leave.

 

[Ants!]

Congrats, Alu!


Alu's kids in ten years: "Dad, why do all of our names start with A?" Have fun explaining that one.

name one of them Ants!

 

[Ben]

name one of them Ants!

This continues to be a name that bugs me when Americans say it. The "h" is silent in British pronunciation. So whenever I hear "AnTHony", it's weird AF.

 

[Ants!]

"Anth"

 

[Kat]

Sure, that's probably the law or something. I'd say it depends how attentive your boss/HR are to that kind of shit. In my experience, no one notices if you don't actually submit PTO for a sick day, or... months of FMLA leave.

Unfortunately, I was a contractor who was billed hourly, so I still had to do a timesheet even though I was salaried. 100% the worst of both worlds, do not recommend.

 

[Ben]

Unfortunately, I was a contractor who was billed hourly, so I still had to do a timesheet even though I was salaried. 100% the worst of both worlds, do not recommend.

Having to track hours is the worst.

 

[A Baby Maker]

I'll bill by the diaper.

Also my step sisters offered to play defense if my step mother became too much. I responded by telling them that she offered to plan the baby shower within 30 seconds of being told.

 

[shortkut]

I'll bill by the diaper.

Also my step sisters offered to play defense if my step mother became too much. I responded by telling them that she offered to plan the baby shower within 30 seconds of being told.

Ooh parental units…

The only baby advise I have:

1. It doesn’t matter what anyone else says or what they swear always works for their child. You and your wife will find out what works for you and your baby.
2. Everyone is going to try to tell you what to do. You need to find the way to tell each person a variation of “thanks for the suggestion. We will see what works” so they leave you alone
3. Anyone providing help needs to give you the help that you want/need, not what they think you want/need. Trying to accept help in a way you don’t need or want can be more frustrating than not having help at all
4. Everyone talks about postpartum depression, but postpartum anxiety is possibly more prevalent and sometimes harder to identify. If your wife chooses to breastfeed, know that breastfeeding causes hormonal fluctuations during and afterwards that can make either PPD or PPA worse
5. It doesn’t matter if the baby is breastfed or formula fed as long as it is fed. Don’t let anyone shame you or your wife for choosing one way over another