Mental Illness & You: How Do You Cope?

[Boots]

I took the RAADS-R and only got an 81.

 

[Pun Damage]

I took the RAADS-R and only got an 81.View attachment 1197

81 is still higher than 64. You may not be autistic but you're definitely neurodivergent.

 

[Boots]

I'll take the ASRS-5 next. They say 30-80% of people with ADHD have autism.

 

[shortkut]

I'll take the ASRS-5 next. They say 30-80% of people with ADHD have autism.

There are things that overlap. The RAADS-R is not supposed to be used independently. @Ryan! might be able to provide more info about it

 

[Tirith]

I took the RAADS-R and only got an 81.View attachment 1197

Says a bit about me, I guess. I've known but never been tested.

 

[Olga]

I did the RAADS-R just now. I think one of the hardest things for me to come to grips with is that I operate best on a schedule and with a list of what to do, but I also suck at following a schedule and having one causes me anxiety.

I talk out loud to myself. A lot. It's how I keep my thoughts straight, and I low key hope that if there are any errors in my thinking someone around me will call me out on it. Saying something out loud also helps me remember it a bit better short term.

Taking the test I think part of why I'm having trouble finding a professional that diagnoses and treats adult autism is because - speaking just for myself - I've built coping mechanisms to try to appear normal. Most of those are rooted in anxiety and worrying entirely too much in how I'm appearing to others, being aware I can dominate a conversation for example and mentally forcing myself to stop.

Hehe, you beat me (164, officially diagnosed as well).

Personally I found that being diagnosed gave me profound relief in the sense that I feel like I’m “allowed” to be weird, but it’s not resulted in any treatment. I’ve heard many people say something similar - that it was good for them to find out about themselves for sure, but generally a diagnosis in your 30s or later comes as little change in life. But maybe I’m missing something here, or the appropriate treatment isn’t available where I live (Austria).

I know a guy who was diagnosed when he was around 8 years old, and according to him, this was a major problem for him because he felt like he was spending his life being “othered” - he was the autistic boy at school, and he hated the experience.

I hope you get what you want, but as you say, you might have developed some pretty good coping mechanisms that serve you well.

Gotta say that finding out I was autistic got me to pay a little more attention to how I behave in conversations, so that part was worthwhile (although somewhat less reliable on the internet…).

I don’t regret being this way, although it sure makes life difficult sometimes. I also wonder what the comorbidity is with depression.

 

[Boots]

The ASRS-5 is only 5 questions. That's ridiculous. I'll need to find something more robust. Scoring on the threshold.

 

[A Slightly New Used Server]

I took that test and found out that I'm not within the autism spectrum. Confirmation that sucking is independent and you're all likely safe on that front.

 

[Tirith]

Oh no, I still suck. Just in my own little way.

 

[Lee]

How do you cope?

What is coping?

 

[Olga]

I took that test and found out that I'm not within the autism spectrum. Confirmation that sucking is independent and you're all likely safe on that front.

The implication here being that autism sucks, which it ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT

 

[Quagmire]

I'll take the ASRS-5 next. They say 30-80% of people with ADHD have autism.

My son has both, my wife has ADHD and may slightly be on the spectrum. One of my best friends, she has recently been diagnosed with both. Very similar behaviors and mannerisms as my wife actually

 

[Olga]

On a vaguely related note: if you take ADHD meds, keep an eye on your eye pressure, which ADHD meds can heighten. If there is history of glaucoma in your family, you need to be very, very careful.

I wasn’t told this when I was given my prescription, and it does not appear to be common knowledge. My mother is going blind due to glaucoma. This stuff is serious!

 

[Lee]

I've been diagnosed with ADHD when I was younger.

 

[A Slightly New Used Server]

The implication here being that autism sucks, which it ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT

Hm? I thought I was saying the opposite. Apologies if it came across as equating you all to my level of suck.

 

[Olga]

Hm? I thought I was saying the opposite. Apologies if it came across as equating you all to my level of suck.

I was kidding, *and* I misunderstood. Possibly I suck despite the autism

 

[Pun Damage]

What is coping?

FAIR.

 

[Fire Queen]

for basically my entire childhood and adolescence i joked that "there's something wrong with me, i just don't know what!" because i knew there was something that made me Different from everyone else i just didn't have the words for it. i was tracked into gifted programs as a kid so whenever i underperformed in school the excuse was that i just "wasn't being challenged enough"

flash forward to grad school and i am still STRUGGLING. i got my primary care provider at the time to refer me to a local ADHD specialist doctor. i got screened and scored on the 99th percentile. every person who worked there was like HOW DID THIS NOT GET CAUGHT SOONER and i was just like

i tried adderall (made me crabby), vyvanse (killed my mood/appetite), strattera (worked fine at first but faded over time), and finally a strattera/vyvanse combo that put my mental health in one of the worst pits it's ever been in. later on i tried vyvanse again but now during the school year i'm on something called JORNAY PM which is basically ritalin you take at night that kicks in in the morning. it's the thing that i've found works best for me but the side effects are still something to watch out for. i'm not even on the highest dose! i'm also on guanfacine which is for Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria specifically--that physical pit in your chest when you feel you've disappointed a loved one, family member, boss, etc.

about a year into seeing my ADHD doc she was like "hey i think you're on the spectrum, let me refer you to a specialist." by this time i was like, 24 going on 25? i did the initial screening and there was enough suspicion that they brought me back for the full screening. it was pretty intense! it lasted like 4 hours, involved an IQ test i wish they'd never told me the results of because even though i know IQ is fake it still went right to my head, and they were basically like "you absolutely have ASD and it is unreal how it did not get caught during your childhood." yet again i just went

that was 2017. 2018 was the year i started seeing a therapist (initially because i didn't feel like i was coping with my Nana's death "correctly" and i also had a bunch of mom related stuff to work through (those of you who knew me pretty well probably know she passed when i was 13 in 2005. i'm still unpacking the impact she had on me!)). my partner and i broke up (on good terms) after nearly a 7-year relationship, the first several years of which were long distance. after that i realized my gender stuff.

in terms of other stuff...CPTSD has been brought up before in this thread and i'm pretty sure i have that too. i've self-diagnosed with dyspraxia which is basically being uncoordinated to a medically significant extent. i also definitely have aphantasia which is the inability to generate visible mental images. they're still there, the lights are just permanently off inside my brain.

lastly, a few years back my therapist and i concluded that i have OSDD-1b, which is like DID (previously known as "multiple personality disorder," fuck the movie Split by the way) but a little different. i won't go into more detail about it unless prompted but if you ever saw pacific rim or, dare i say, steven universe, it's kind of like that. there are two of us but most of the time we are in sync enough that there is functionally one of us and that person is marina whom you all know and love!

oh yeah i also probably have clinical depression and i'm seeing a psych on friday to get that sorted lol

 

[Fire Queen]

I was kidding, *and* I misunderstood. Possibly I suck despite the autism

the results are in. congratulations, you rule! both because of the autism and also for different reasons

 

[A Slightly New Used Server]

the results are in. congratulations, you rule! both because of the autism and also for different reasons

Because

 

[Tirith]

The "coping" thing.... Take what has worked to help over my last 36 years of life, and keep doing it. If I tried something to "fit in" or be "normal" and it didn't work, I didn't try again.

I hate pretending to be normal. I'd rather be myself.

 

[Pun Damage]

... I'm also on guanfacine which is for Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria specifically--that physical pit in your chest when you feel you've disappointed a loved one, family member, boss, etc...

There's meds for that?!

 

[Olga]

the results are in. congratulations, you rule! both because of the autism and also for different reasons

Thanks, of all days, today was a good day to read that.

 

[Fire Queen]

There's meds for that?!

there sure are! from the research i've seen it doesn't have the intended effect on everyone (mostly it deals a lot with impulse control) but for the people it works for it WORKS. i have not felt that pit in my chest in YEARS and it has made having difficult but necessary conversations SO MUCH EASIER

Thanks, of all days, today was a good day to read that.

we are constantly having a super cool lightsaber battle except our lightsabers are simply very nice and heartfelt things we are saying to one another

 

[Pun Damage]

there sure are! from the research i've seen it doesn't have the intended effect on everyone (mostly it deals a lot with impulse control) but for the people it works for it WORKS. i have not felt that pit in my chest in YEARS and it has made having difficult but necessary conversations SO MUCH EASIER

I think I need to ask my psych about this. I avoid situations that even have a possibility of landing me that pain because it hurts so much.

 

[Quagmire]

I guess seems about right, I didnt really like the answer choices sometimes, absolutes don't work for every question. Also when I was younger, yeah I wasnt always able to emphasize because I was an adolescence and a few others.

 

[Fire Queen]

I think I need to ask my psych about this. I avoid situations that even have a possibility of landing me that pain because it hurts so much.

i think it's definitely worth a try, yeah. hopefully your brain chemistry allows for it because it's a real gamechanger!

 

[Olga]

there sure are! from the research i've seen it doesn't have the intended effect on everyone (mostly it deals a lot with impulse control) but for the people it works for it WORKS. i have not felt that pit in my chest in YEARS and it has made having difficult but necessary conversations SO MUCH EASIER

bloody hell!!! Ok, I might give this a go. I found Ritalin wasn’t great for me, and the sounds… interesting. Thanks for telling us about yourself, and this!

 

[Ryan!]

There are things that overlap. The RAADS-R is not supposed to be used independently. @Ryan! might be able to provide more info about it

I remember reading a study where like 20% of FND participants scored higher on the RAADS-R.

It isn't a reliable diagnostic tool as it delivers a lot of false positives.

 

[shortkut]

I remember reading a study where like 20% of FND participants scored higher on the RAADS-R.

It isn't a reliable diagnostic tool as it delivers a lot of false positives.

Alternatively, most GW members are on the spectrum

 

[Ryan!]

Alternatively, most GW members are on the spectrum

Well there is that

 

[Quagmire]

The ASRS-5 is only 5 questions. That's ridiculous. I'll need to find something more robust. Scoring on the threshold.

Yeah figured there would be more, but maybe they got it down to a science

I got a 6

 

[Raine]

Alternatively, most GW members are on the spectrum

This is something that's immediately noticeable in a lot of hobbies once you get people talking. I first noticed it when I started playing MMOs. Relative the average, geek/nerd circles skew insanely far towards neurodivergent people, LGBT+ folks and people with social/anxiety disorders. To such an extent that I began to question whether joining and/or sticking with certain games basically required someone to have certain conditions or frames of mind.

Which, realistically, through a combination of escapism and psychological manipulation is probably not far off the mark.

 

[Duke Nukem]

Works for me.

 

[Mark]

This is something that's immediately noticeable in a lot of hobbies once you get people talking. I first noticed it when I started playing MMOs. Relative the average, geek/nerd circles skew insanely far towards neurodivergent people, LGBT+ folks and people with social/anxiety disorders. To such an extent that I began to question whether joining and/or sticking with certain games basically required someone to have certain conditions or frames of mind.

Which, realistically, through a combination of escapism and psychological manipulation is probably not far off the mark.

But see… with the broadening of the spectrum, it’s becoming increasingly common for anyone to tick a box or two. Could it be an environmental factor like the times we’re living in? Absolutely. Could it be scientific or psychological discovery? Absolutely.

My question, I guess, is where does the line get drawn? At what point do so many people tick off boxes associated with the spectrum that it no longer matters because so many people are on it? Alternatively, at what point does it become so overly diagnosed that people just cannot be quirky or particular without being diagnosed as autistic by a professional or their peers and those traits that used to be appreciated become compromised?

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t throwing skepticism at people who are diagnosed or passing any kind of judgement… I just don’t know why it covers everyone from the artistically inclined and the methodically organized and ends on the other end with non-verbal, sensory sensitive, or behavioral incidents.

As the definition has expanded for me from that one kid that was on Ritalin growing up to seeing people everywhere, not just here, confessing or suspecting that they’re on the spectrum… I just can’t help but wonder if it’s a disservice to people on both sides of the spectrum, because although there are different “types”… it still falls under a blanket generalization. Does this mean that our next generation of artists are going to be kneecapped by medications because their parents read somewhere that they were autistic? Even worse… what does that mean for those non-verbal kids that can’t communicate their intellect?

Mostly I’m afraid for the over-prescription of the drugs commonly associated with the emotional and psychological effects of those on the spectrum… like ADD/ADHD. I’ve known people who’ve become addicted to Adderall because the shit is an amphetamine, and then when they talk about it they say “oh, well I’m autistic and I have ADHD”… but they weren’t like that BEFORE they began the medication. I know autism and ADHD aren’t the same, but I’m seeing a lot more connections being made from autism to other conditions like ADHD, so that’s the example I went with. I have a major beef with the pharmaceutical industry, and although modern medicine helps a lot of people live stable and fulfilling lives, as evident by people posting here… it also turns a lot of people into zombies and worse, and the trial and error process can be fatal for some on anti-psychotics or mood stabilizers. I lost a friend to suicide when I was a teenager, the only drug in his system was the antidepressant he was prescribed. He said for MONTHS that he felt calmer, but he was always either emotionless or depressed. His parents wouldn’t advocate for him to the doctors because he was behaving better, but they knew he was getting dark. Yes, there’s a neglect element there, but… it doesn’t just fall on the parents. The doctor should have been assessing the patient, not the parents and their satisfied results.

 

[Raine]

My question, I guess, is where does the line get drawn? At what point do so many people tick off boxes associated with the spectrum that it no longer matters because so many people are on it? Alternatively, at what point does it become so overly diagnosed that people just cannot be quirky or particular without being diagnosed as autistic by a professional or their peers and those traits that used to be appreciated become compromised?

Well, that is sort of the point. People on the spectrum are as "normal" as anyone else, they're simply wired differently. Think differently, perhaps. Society at large still hears "Autism" and immediately thinks of the kids from sensationalized daytime television or Hollywood movies that are completely trapped inside their own head; in their own little world, where so much as touching them sends them into hysterics. Or they'll jump to something like Down Syndrome, because again that's what they've seen and that particular condition has obvious signs. Do people like that exist? Yeah, they do. But that's not what the (overwhelming) majority of people that find themselves on the spectrum look or behave like.

I think the distinction here is that it's perfectly fine if you're on the spectrum. That's not something you're supposed to "fix," it's part of who you are. But sometimes you just manage any less than desirable side effects of that. Like problems with attention span, not being able to sit still, not being able to sleep, or having anxiety for whatever number of reasons. Which is where medication and alternative therapies come into play. I'm not big on capitalism myself, obviously, and I'm personally super wary of taking anything that messes with my thought processes. But, if I - or others - need help, I think I would prefer easy accessibility instead of jumping through hoops. 'Cause lord knows America as a whole still doesn't take mental health seriously.

Is it perfect? Nah. But until something gets done to fix how ass backwards everything works, support groups/networks and easy access are the keys to a more satisfying life.

 

[Pun Damage]

View attachment 1205
Works for me.

If this is true, it explains SO MUCH about my music taste.

 

[Duke Nukem]

If this is true, it explains SO MUCH about my music taste.

Does this mean you listen to trance and feel good or that you don't listen to trance and feel bad?

 

[Pun Damage]

Does this mean you listen to trance and feel good or that you don't listen to trance and feel bad?

I listen to trance (and lots of other electronic music) and feel good.

 

[Fool's Requiem]

Man, I'm going through this RAADS-R questionnaire, and so many of these questions I'm thinking "Depends on the situation" or "not all the time". Test feels very black and white with no room for gray.

Here's a good example:

"I get extremely upset when the way I like to do things is suddenly changed."
"Extremely" is a strong word. I do often get upset when things don't go as planned, but not "extremely" upset.

"I speak with a normal rhythm."
WTF is a "normal rhythm?"

Thing says I got a 100.
"90 - Stronger indications of autism, although non-autistics may score as high."

Pretty important statement there. I also feel like the test is unable to differentiate autism from introversion.
Regardless, I don't feel the need to go out and get tested for anything. Any weird stuff about me is just something I've accepted and does not bother me. I don't have any problems functioning in society. Not that I don't understand there are some synchronicities to my personality that would be considered "abnormal" (like lack of motivation to find a SO), but that isn't something I feel I need to try to cope with.

 

[The Flame]

Man, I'm going through this RAADS-R questionnaire, and so many of these questions I'm thinking "Depends on the situation" or "not all the time". Test feels very black and white with no room for gray.

Yeah I've always wondered if I have some autism going on or if I'm just an introvert with social anxiety, but I looked at that test and was like "Wtf is this? How am I supposed to answer any of these?"

 

[Holly]

Yeah, I can feel that. I'm diagnosed ADHD but I deal with a hefty bit of impostor syndrome. It's also why I'm reluctant to self-diagnose based on tests such as that one, regardless of the results.

 

[gigi]

i struggle very commonly if i'm being honest with you..... there is a massive background story....

 

[Quagmire]

Here's a good example:

"I get extremely upset when the way I like to do things is suddenly changed."
"Extremely" is a strong word. I do often get upset when things don't go as planned, but not "extremely" upset.

Yep and it depends on why things didnt go as plan. Is it something out of everyone's control? Or was it because someone wasnt dong what they were supposed to or forgot about something or it was preventable in some other way?

 

[Fire Queen]

i also feel like tests such as these assume that the taker has developed absolutely no coping methods or masking skills on their own

 

[Mark]

Man, I'm going through this RAADS-R questionnaire, and so many of these questions I'm thinking "Depends on the situation" or "not all the time". Test feels very black and white with no room for gray.

Here's a good example:

"I get extremely upset when the way I like to do things is suddenly changed."
"Extremely" is a strong word. I do often get upset when things don't go as planned, but not "extremely" upset.

"I speak with a normal rhythm."
WTF is a "normal rhythm?"

Thing says I got a 100.
"90 - Stronger indications of autism, although non-autistics may score as high."

Pretty important statement there. I also feel like the test is unable to differentiate autism from introversion.
Regardless, I don't feel the need to go out and get tested for anything. Any weird stuff about me is just something I've accepted and does not bother me. I don't have any problems functioning in society. Not that I don't understand there are some synchronicities to my personality that would be considered "abnormal" (like lack of motivation to find a SO), but that isn't something I feel I need to try to cope with.

This goes in line with what I was mentioning earlier… it has become a blanket definition for anyone that doesn’t fit precisely into the “functionally normal” category. The terminology is specific, but the actual language of what defines an autistic person is extremely ambiguous.

Yeah, I can feel that. I'm diagnosed ADHD but I deal with a hefty bit of impostor syndrome. It's also why I'm reluctant to self-diagnose based on tests such as that one, regardless of the results.

The problem with these online tests is they’re really no different than clickbait. Even those tests conducted as “research” are still presented in a way that makes them social media shareable… which is kinda odd to think about. No one outside of teenagers crying for attention or adults “addicted” to sharing these types of quizzes (we’ve all seen people do it) are participating in those things. You’re not going to see @Ryan! in a clinical setting telling patients to take a “Buzzfeed quiz” style questionnaire about autism or any other spectrum-related condition for the simple fact that, as far as I’m aware, it requires much more than a few questions to diagnosis a patient with any type of condition.

It isn’t unlike PTSD and anxiety self-diagnosis these days. Everyone has anxiety about different things in their lives. Everyone has traumatic experiences that they cope with. However, the vast majority of people claiming these conditions were never subjected to the adverse effects associated with them. For example… my ex-girlfriend was one of those “I can’t go to the store” types… only when it suited her. She claimed anxiety and PTSD from various things, but she had ZERO issue going to the store when it benefited her. If she said or did something wrong and was called out for it… guess what? Anxiety. Meanwhile, at the very same time… I was waking up in the middle of a dead sleep screaming at someone to put the gun down, jumping awake out of a sound sleep, and grabbing her arm if she would attempt to wake me. I didn’t think anything serious of it until after I was forced to go speak to an occupational psychologist or psychiatrist… basically, a shrink for military, cops, firefighters, EMT’s, doctors, and people who encounter bad shit like me… it was her specialty.

My point is, although people cope and react to these conditions differently… when a group of people are targeted with an intentionally vague questionnaire, naturally, you’re going to be fed results that affirm what you want to believe to be true about yourself… which is a slippery slope. No one with anxiety or PTSD sees it as a bragging right or a personality trait worth sharing with anyone that’ll listen. However… when you see 20 of your Facebook friends sharing a “Answer these 5 questions to see if you have autism” article, and of that, 15 of those friends are categorized as on the spectrum… suddenly you have the other 5 trying to figure out how they fit into the criteria so they’re not “left out”.

A prime example of that could be this very thread. I’m in no position to say anyone here is lying, nor do I want to think that anyone would be lying… but, as evident by one person taking a test and sharing it, and then several others participating afterwards, it creates a herd mentality. Everyone follows that one person to that one quiz, and then suddenly folks are trying to take one question out of five and apply it to themselves for self-diagnosis purposes. We are FAR too unique and different from one another for a measly 5 questions to adequately categorize any one of us, no matter how in-depth each question is. You could have 100 questions, even, and the fact remains that there are still infinitely more variables than that that make up each and every one of us.

Yeah I've always wondered if I have some autism going on or if I'm just an introvert with social anxiety, but I looked at that test and was like "Wtf is this? How am I supposed to answer any of these?"

Yeah, I can feel that. I'm diagnosed ADHD but I deal with a hefty bit of impostor syndrome. It's also why I'm reluctant to self-diagnose based on tests such as that one, regardless of the results.

These two responses are exactly what I’m talking about.

I won’t pretend to be a shrink, we have a resident one here. But… I’d love to hear what he thinks of what I’m saying about this and how far off base my assessment is. My background ends at reading people… body language specifically, but there’s a level of understanding human behavior that comes along with it.

i also feel like tests such as these assume that the taker has developed absolutely no coping methods or masking skills on their own

This is also a HUGE point to make… because more often than not, the people we see self-diagnosing aren’t actively trying to correct the patterns and actions that are causing them to feel associated with a particular condition. One could argue that it’s because of a lack of treatment, but the fact is… if you have time to take a fuckton of quizzes, you have the time for some introspection… Is it really anxiety? Or are you just incapable of being told something you don’t like without reacting adversely?